New Year’s Reboot

I have realized time and time again that I absolutely suck with the whole ‘new year new me’ shtick.
And I know exactly why too – I completely lack in discipline. I would much rather do nothing and be great at it, than do something and absolutely fail at it. But. I also realize this does not a functioning member of society make.

On the very last day of 2015 I came across this understanding and decided that I was not going to allow myself to fall into a rut again. The semester before had been full and brutal, and I was not going to put myself through hell and high water with a bare minimum of survival in every aspect.
So I sat down and actually wrote down my new year’s resolutions. I was going to tackle 2016 with a fierceness no would see coming! I was going to redefine my life, reinvigorate my soul, and become the me I want and more!

And now I find myself on February 9, 2016 in the same rut I was in, in 2015, thinking what the actual hell. How did I lose more than a month to nothing??

Well it’s obvious – it’s so easy to fall into old habits.

It’s comforting to not owe anyone anything, or worry about meeting an expectation. The trouble is that this is not happiness. This is not progress. And this is completely counter-intuitive as a Muslim.
Being a part of the amazing Ummuah, we’re supposed to constantly grow and blossom – internally and externally. We’re fixers. We are satisfied and grateful for all we have been given while realizing constantly that we can do so much more in all that we give.
Am I making sense outside of my head?

So I know all this. So now what?
First and foremost it’s reboot time.
I cannot stand where I am right now. I know I can do better.

The tricky part will be to allow myself to accept the difficulties while not turning them into excuses. It’s so easy to throw a pity party for myself. But that’s one of those shindigs where everyone stands around awkwardly, not knowing one another or caring to know one another, wondering when it’s socially acceptable to go home, change into pj’s and form butt-prints on the couch.
That is not the kind of party I want to throw.

The difficulties: Anxiety is at an all time high for some reason which, of course, means depression is at an all time high.
The acceptance: It might not get easier.
The non-excuse: I am an extrovert who needs to go out and do things and be around people. If I allow myself to focus on my symptoms, I’m going to be bed-ridden and make it all worse.

Okay. That’s step one.
And well this blog entry is step two. I miss writing, even if it does lack a solid point or form, or readers. I used to blog to get out of my head. Insha’Allah, I want to get back at it for the same reason.

February 9, 2016 – the New Year’s Reboot. This blog marks it.

On a positive note of substance: Taco Bell just came out with the Quesalupa. What more could a person ask for??

-Sobia.

Lessons in learning. Wait, I Mean Teaching!

So, Allhamdullillah, I completed my first unexpected semester of teaching, and I almost feel like I gypped my students because I feel like I’m walking away with more lessons to learn from xD
Without further adieu: my reflection post!

– I learned that I don’t think I will ever not be a student. And I don’t think I will ever not relate to a student. The student life is difficult but also comfortable, because it’s this odd mix of responsibility and vulnerability and insecurity.
And I don’t think I am the kind of person that will grow out of that phase.
I think I just need to accept that.
I’m not necessarily complaining about this revelation though.
I like being a student (figuratively and literally); I’m always in a state of learning. Plus, having a student mentality makes it easier to grow in humility, I think. When you allow yourself to learn from someone, whether they are older or younger than you, you are allowing for yourself to be imperfect and incomplete. You realize that there is still someone out there (a many someones out there) who know more than you, and you have to step back and appreciate that.
For this, I appreciate my students and my coworkers.
I’ve learned a lot, and I know I have quite a ways to go.

– Do we ever really stop being high school students?
Yes, absolutely. But you establish quite a bit of your personality in your high school years. I went through that in Bush, and I can’t say if I was very aware of the process. But it was interesting to watch my students. I loved how different all of my classes were. I loved the comrade-ry, the silliness, the self-awareness, and also the lack of self-awareness. I think the best way to describe my particular brand of adulthood is one foot in high school, one foot in college, a hand at home, and the other holding a big mug of tea. My head is in the clouds of course – don’t think that will ever change xD

– I loved all of my students.
This actually did surprise me because I had barely 5 months with them. I thought that, at most, I would have a fondness for them. But nope! I love every single one of my students to bits! They’re all so special. Each one had a hand in making my experience unique, and I wouldn’t trade a single one out of any of my classes. My first graders were a handful, because it was a full class Mashallah. But each one had sch a generous heart.
My second graders had this amazing sense of care for one another. This was also the class that I got to spend the most time with, so I really did almost cry during my last class with them!
And my high schoolers, I don’t even know where to begin with them!
My high schoolers were an inquisitive and intelligent bunch. I looked forward to my class with them the most. I enjoyed reading their work, and answering their questions. I loved when they participated in the discussions, because there was always something interesting to be said by someone or another.

– My career choice has been validated: I am more than 100% sure that I want to teach High School, preferably a non-core academic class. I’m fairly certain I would hate teaching to a test, and I feel bad for the teachers that have to do that, because I know they hate it. I love teaching Journalism, I hope that’s what I’m meant for Inshallah.

– I was very ambitious, I wanted my students to walk away knowing everything!
But that was a learning lesson too. Next time I’m breaking things into actual units. And I won’t pretend I’m SuperWoman anymore =__=;;

– School is getting more and more stressful.
It’s not just me, it’s not just college – it’s the general atmosphere of our nation. Everything good is just getting harder. And I feel for my students.

– I hate homework.
With a passion. I made sure to do my best to assign as little as possible, and to offer resources during class time, so that students wouldn’t have to work at home. I thought I hated getting homework, but really the guilt of assigning it made me feel like the Wicked Witch of the West.

– I don’t understand why almost every teacher/professor I had would say something along the lines of “this won’t be acceptable in the REAL world.”
Now that I am living, and a functioning part of the real world I can say that my biggest shock factor, was that the REAL world is full of humans *GASP!*
It’s okay if you get caught in a traffic jam, or the printer isn’t working, or your alarm didn’t go off so you’re late 10 extra minutes, or whatever. It’s okay. I’m not saying anyone has to make a personality factor or a habit of being a flake. I’m just saying that the human condition requires compassion and a little room to stumble now and again.

– I hate tests.
Yes I understand they are necessary – sometimes! But for my hippie, indie, intro level class I hated the idea of a test. For my class, a standardized test wouldn’t measure jack. Allhamdullillah.

– I think I may have been one the cool teachers….
And I think that was pretty cool!

– I always want my students to be comfortable with themselves with me.
It’s so important for kids of any age to feel safe with the adults in their lives. I hope I established myself as one of those adults.

– You don’t have to know your students for years to feel the need to defend them.
I realized I will fight tooth and nail for all of my kiddos. It’s a strange realization- that you can feel so overprotective of a group of humans who are not your family or chosen friends.
But that’s the life of a teacher I suppose – You feel on a whole other level.

– I love being a teacher, a teacher’s assistant, a student, and a worker for my school in specific.
I would not trade my previous 5 months for anything. I look forward to working here for many more years, Inshallah. I never thought I could break the monotonous norm of hating your job, but here I am loving all of it, and I’m so thankful for that.

Oh and if any of my students are reading this, feel free to un-follow me here and on Twitter. If you’d rather stay a follower, that’s cool too. You’re call 🙂

Thank God it’s summer!

-Sobia.

A Time Of Need

Salam dear students,

Yesterday all of us received the news of young Heba’s passing.

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Rajioon.

I, unfortunately, never had the opportunity to meet her. However, I still went to the Janazah today because- well a number of reasons. Through everything I couldn’t help but flashback a few times to Amina’s passing…

Death is not an easy reality to face. It is a true test of patience and faith for the living.

I don’t know which ones of you knew her, which ones were close, and how this reality has affected any of you. But if you need to talk to someone, or if you need someone to listen to you, please don’t hesitate to contact me. I’m here for all of you.

-Sobia.

Recommendations

Hello Class!
With limited time and a number of assignments due, I have a few recommendations to help with time management and to avoid homework.

On Friday the 1st: Complete evaluating the company; analyze your data; complete memo and press release (at least a rough draft); plan your vine and instagram; outline your big campaign.

Monday: Work on billboard, radio, and your commercial.

Wednesday: Online commercial and this would also be a good day to live tweet or at least plan when to live tweet. Work on leftover work from Friday and Monday.

Friday: Focus on your big campaign, work out the kinks. If you need to work on the computer to finalize, let me know in advance!

Monday: Final touches! (LAST DAY TO MAKE UP QUIZES AND ANYTHING ELSE)

Tuesday: Check this blog for an update, your review will be available Inshallah.

Wednesday: PR+AD CAMPAIGN DUE.

Friday: Final Quiz. All warm-ups due.

My suggestion is to have everything basically done by next Wednesday so that you can relax for the final week and focus on your other classes. I know finals are around the corner – I promise I’m not trying to inconvenient you or burden your schedule anymore.

If you are proactive and manage your time well, this should be fairly fun and fairly easy.

Good luck!

Sobia.

The Big Project

Hello Students!

As promised, I am uploading my powerpoint presentation from class, on my blog.
This presentation is basically everything (ok like 90%) of the guidelines you need.

If you have questions, message, call, or email me. DO NOT TEXT ME! My phone is being a miserable, miserable little wasp. All my texts pop up for an instant and then disappear into the Further. So please do not text me, the Further will only receive  another victim. :((

-Sobia.

PR and ADV